Saturday, July 28, 2007
Haunted by past memories
Well, after the movie i fetch my friend home and then meet up with my another friend who's staying around her place. So, just drop by at her place and ask her out for a drink. But it ended quite early as she's very sleepy and tired but i've told her already that if she's tired and all, i'll just meet up with her some other time. Geez.. i just don't get it! Anyway, it's happy to see her again but in the mean time it's also sad as well to see her again as there's still some remaining stuff in me. I just can't seem to get over with it tho it's been like almost 4-5 months? Gosh... help me.. anyone?
Besides, i'm really really used to like touch her face, hair or maybe kacau her nose or someting like that but things just aren't the same as last time. She told me she doesn't like people to do that to her as it might cause misunderstood. She told me she's fine with it bu some other girls just doesn't like it. Maybe so does she. Just hinting me to stop that doing from now on. SIGH~~~somehow i've used to do that to her... time just can't be rewind. I still miss her...
SHIT!!! FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHAT THE FCUK IS WRONG WITH ME??? STOP IT BRIAN!!
SOMEHOW FEELINGS ARE JUST SO HARD TO CONTROL, AIN'T THAT SO?
Besides, i dreamt of her few days ago and i recall that we're walking down on the street and we're very close to each other and somehow i took something from her hand and my hand accidentally touches her soft small hands and somehow i wanted to let go but then i was curious at the same time why she holds my hand and never wanted to let go as we're only friends? And then i woke up...-_-" it once happened in reality but it won't happen again twice in reality. I can assure that.
Well, i thought it's going to rain soon as i saw lightning and all and i'm driving all alone in the street of emptiness. Furthermore, my car's playlist is playing some nice relaxing chillout ambient music esp when it's playing late night alumni's rainy days, i just saw the lightning flashing here and there. DAMN! And at that time my mood wasn't really good at all, it just drop all in a sudden. Maybe it's due to that incident just now...
HOW??? How can i get rid of these feelings? It's killing and torturing and me. Always haunted by pass memories. Well, that's the same o' Brian. Always loyal to love, i hate myself!
I feeling very emo now. Need some emo songs, maybe my friend could help me with that as she has loads of emo songs. I'll just ask her to send some to me tomorrow.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
the sweet sound of rain drops
For me, the best time is when it rains in the middle of the night, and i'm all alone inside the car, parked at the side of the highway, listening to some music and also the sound of the rain drops falling onto your car, the feeling is just awesome. Somehow it also brings lonely, serene, relaxing and gloomy feeling but it's nice! very very nice...! it's been a while i didn't try... sigh
Somehow i find it romantic at the same time but i don't think some people might think so, they might think it's really weird. I had a friend who understand how i feel, she's not weird, but she's pretty, really really pretty. Ahaha...
I wanna try walking in the rain, i wonder how it feels. Cause nobody could see me crying in the rain... hopefully while i'm walking i won't get struck by lightning, very easy to get strucked when u're walking in an open field. Dangerous... but i guess the feeling is nice tho? =P
3 more weeks to go and i'm really done with TOA, been spending my whole damn 3 lifeless years at TOA. It's really really lifeless when you wanna go and hang out with friends at night but you're just bounded to your bloody assignments. Sigh.. what a nice turn off could that be... =(
Furthermore, i'm in my graduation mood already, don't have the feeling to do my work at all, been slacking for the whole damn semester. =( But anyway.. i hope i won't fail any of the subjects this sem, if not... shit!
Finally, i can graduate. But the sad thing is, this is the second time i'm attending a graduation ceremony, the first time was in Taylor's. =) URGH... i just miss my happy times at Taylor's. Sigh... growing up and getting old each year. =(
Thursday, July 19, 2007
everything in this world is all copied
Geez, i wonder why would they want to copy that idea? it somehow doesn't link to the lyrics of the music.
Anyway, watched the MTV first, then only watch the ad. If you don't understand the ad, feel free to ask me and i'll explain to you what it means.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Mistake
After that, we gave the birthday girl a surprise, gave her a surprise bday cake and then sing a birthday song for her. She's touched and then tears start falling from her eyes when she's taking pic with each and everyone who attended the dinner.
After that, i can't stay long as i have to rush home to finish off my annual report. So, i'm the first one to leave. Well,at that time i wasn't really that happy at all, quite moody, don't know why. The feeling just somehow came. I somehow regreted of going there but i had to go as it's my friend's bday. Lots of things start popping out of my bloody mind while i was driving home alone. Went home, took a nice hot shower and get on with my work but somehow my mind still thinks of her. I thought i could get rid of it but HELL NO! Urgh... this memory just drives me crazy and i'm quite pissed at myself.
I was looking back at something which she gave to me and there's a song which meant alot to me which represents my love for her. Everytime when the song is playing on my playlist, my mind eventually will drift towards her. My heart was aching and i felt quite sad. I regret never listen to my bestie, she told me to get to know her more then only see whether is it suitable to continue. Well, at that time i did thought about it but then, feeling can make someone out of control. It was a mistake to love her, it was a mistake to make the first move on that day itself and i regret of doing so! It was really really a big mistake to asked her out on that very special day!!! What was i thinking? I just think that it's all a mistake from the begining. I believe that feelings can grow by time and it does. From a minor one to a major one. Well, that's me. Lots of things which makes me recalling her. I don't know why past memories still haunts me, how i wish memories can be erase and so does feelings so i won't suffer so much right now. I rather lose such memories rather than suffering right now! It's already few months and yet somehow there are some remainings.
Sigh, that's why i told myself, if there will be another one coming soon, it will be a fun one and not a serious one. I'm sick of being loyal and being too loyal might get myself into lots of trouble. They say librans are the most loyal ones to their loved one, i guess it's somehow true? Am i one of them? trying not to be one... it sucks.. it seriously does. I'm done with it. Can someone help me erase all the sad and painful memories?
IT WAS A BIG MISTAKE TO LOVE YOU AND TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!!
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Mid-east
Well, went to KLCC to watch Dead silence with Ken and Juno yesterday night and went for diehard 4.0 today at Pyramid, cinema was small and the seats aren’t really good. The seat which I’m sitting at has lost it’s handle. -_-“ But anyway, I always tell my friends that I hate and dislike watching horror movies and they all laugh at me. Hahaha, laugh all you guys want and I admit it! It’s because I’m really scared of it, I find it quite disturbing and gross. Yucks! But surprisingly I went and watch Dead Silence and I’ve been waiting for the movie to come out few months ago and I manage to watch it yesterday! The movie was good but the ending was kinda bad and stupid? It’s like putting so much of effort in it but in the end you still face the same result. Sigh…
But there’s one thing which annoys me and pisses me off is those god damn muthafarking middle-east b*stards…! They just can’t stop talking in the cinema. From the beginning till the end, they just keep on talk and talk and talk. Can’t they just shut their god damn mouth up for a minute? It really annoys me when people talk inside the cinema, if you talk just a little bit it’s fine, but don’t talk all the way in the movie? Don’t these people have any respect for other people? There are lots of people who ask them to keep quite but still, they talk inside the cinema. Really really uncivilized b*stards… There are a number of times already, not only yesterday, these people keep on talk and talk and talk inside the cinema while the movie was on! Really fark up b*stard…! I’m really really pissed! Picture this, one whole row of middle east people, talking to one and another from the beginning till the end and that’s what happen yesterday. Will you be pissed when people talk inside the cinema from the beginning till the end? I bet you will. After the movie was over, lights are on and I can see, lots of people turning their heads behind and see who’s the b*stards who talks in the cinema and yet they just don’t bother!
Monday, July 9, 2007
70%
Digital Love by Daft Punk
Pernah by Ferhad
Come As You Are by Nirvana
So, where should I start? Hm…I guess I’ve already made up my mind of where to go next. It’s most probably to the States which is in
Anyway… it’s been a pretty bad week I guess, been sleeping quite a lot in the noon and go to bed around 7am in the morning, Just like Saturday night, my friend suddenly call me and ask me to go to KL to have a farewell party for a friend of mine. She’ll be leaving to
Well, better get back to work again. If not, got to burn the
Saturday, July 7, 2007
night guardian or just an owl?
check out time by tupac shakur
katrina by david tao
walking after you by foo fighters
Beautiful Things (Gabriel & Dresden Remix) by DJ Tiesto
Well, been sleeping a lot lately and my sleeping time is really really a heck! This whole entire week, i almost sleep at 7am in the morning due to long noon nap. Sigh... i stay up the whole night and today i tried to go to sleep but it's already 7am and yet i'm so so awake! I got so frustrated and gave up sleeping. Went downstairs and watch TV had breakfast with my mom. Skip replacement class today as i know i'll defintely fall asleep while the lecturer is lecturing. So, no point wasting my time going all the way to sunway just to fall asleep in class and also to waste the petrol too. -_-" my car really consume lots of petrol. I just pumped full tank on thurs before going to college. And then at night went to Maison and yesterday i went to Lap Soon at Section17 to print some stuff for my packaging design and then head straight to 1U to have lunch with my friend. And went home. And i realised that my petrol consumed at least RM15-RM20 by just travelling to these few places and my car's only 1.0 auto. Geez... damn!
Last thursday night went clubbing at Maison with my buddy and his friends. Well, at first we're supposed to enter Velvet but then they're playing house music which my friends don't quite like it but i don't mind as i kinda like it. So, we headed to Maison and it's just so damn packed as usual on Thursday night. Can't get a table that night but only to stand and hang out at the bar area upstairs. As usual, lots of chun chicks were there but it's not my turn to get to know them as i'm not really that attractive. But it's fun tho. Went to the podium to dance but it's just so damn packed that we're bumping onto each other and people are pushing here and there. URGH! my buddy almost got into a fist fight as 1 of the kid aged around 18-19 was complaining to my friend that he had pushed him. It wasn't my buddy's fault at all, it's the people behind him which are pushing him and that's why he bump onto him. And the worst thing is, he needed damn bloody many space to dance. Brainless kid.. sigh... inmature b*stard! The purpose of going clubbing is just to have fun, enjoy with friends and maybe pick up some chicks if you're a good and not to find trouble with you...! Use your head and think, well unless you don't have a brain for you to think. Then too bad la.
Same thing that night, just right out of Maison there's some quarreling la, tho i don't know what's the problem but i can tell it's defintely someone got drunk and trying to find some trouble la, just like what my buddy encounter that night.
Well, same thing, almost got drunk but then i'm still able to drive home unlike the previous week were i couldn't really drive at all tho i now i could but better not la as i had to fetch 2 people home. So, yea. hahahaha... Now, gotta get back to work only and no more clubbing on thursday night as i had to rushed friday's work and i can tell you every thursday i'll definitely don't have enough of sleeping time. Sigh... can only club on Saturday night but i don't mind as my friend said Saturday night at Velvet is quite happening. Haven't really been to Velvet as i'm underage, but i don't think it's a problem as long as you dress matured. Tho i could dress maturely but my face, babyface. Urgh... i don't want to have a babyface. It's like you're 22 and people though that you're 20 only. Aiya.. geez... not a good sign.
Anyway... i'm kinda sleepy right now, better get a short noon nap. Hopefully it's a short one.
zeon signing off, peace out
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Urgh...!
Yes, very very BLUE!!!!
So, i was sitting as Juno's computer table and i saw a cut out article placed there. So, i read it and it's about how your body's going to turn bad if you continued to sleep late everyday. It strictly reflects people like me, Juno and few of our friends cause we don't really sleep early due to assignments and also we're really used to it. Sigh~~ sad life. Imagine, last time before entering TOA, life is so much better, i still prefer my life while i was in Taylor's. Very fun and free. Now, heck...! Last time i still remember, when the clock reaches around 2 or 2.30am, i would say " Oh Shit!, it's 2 aledi ah...better sleep now." But now, as the clock reaches 2 or 2.30am and so on, " Har? Now only 2 ar, ceh... so early, later only sleep la, i'll sleep around 4+ la."
We call people who stay up late in cantonese it's called "ye guai" which means night ghost if you translate it to engish. By the way, sleeping late can increase the risk of getting high blood pressure and i'm going to hit that target soon, real soon.
Few months ago i went for a medical check-up and the results are really satisfying, almost hit the target of getting urine acid due to many intakes of red meats like beef (my fav meat of all), and almost hit the target of getting high blood pressure and then some other not really pleasant result la.
You see, that's how i'm am really right now and my mom always scold me for staying up so late. My eye bags are getting darker and bigger, damn...! it's like you'll see a walking zombie on the streets. Haih...
When classes are on, sleeping time is only around 3-4 hours per week and average of time staying up late is around 4-6am per week. Yes... When i go to sleep, it's time for peole to wake up and prepare themselves to either go to work or go to school/ college. Sigh~ =(
Monday, July 2, 2007
Marché@The Curve
Well, that's the first time i dined at there, quite special compared to other restaurant at The Curve. Food quality was good as well, but it's a lil' bit expensive but i think it's kinda resonable for restaurants at The Curve?
Well, it kicked off with an Italian pan cake? i forgot it's name. It's made of potatoes, cheese, and salmon fish which cost RM12.90. It's really yummy. I like it. I also saw some risotto, O_O... risotto are yummy as well but it's very filling as they're quite creamy. For those of you who don't know what a risotto is, it's actually an Italian rice cooked with white cream sauce (bechamel sauce), stock (depends on what meat) but normally they use beef stock or chicken stock to boil the rice so it's tasty, and they'll add some meat onto it as well. And another thing, cheese... yummy!
Then i head onto my main course, which is a stirloin steak. I told the chef i wanted my meat to be medium but in the end it became almost well-done. I hate eating my beef well done. I perfer it to be half cooked and half bloody. XD and i told him i wanted brown sauce and instead he gave me mushroom sauce. -_-" and the thing is, i dont' really like my steak to match with mushroom sauce, it should be brown sauce... damn! Instead of having steak, i should have taken the lamb stew. Juno and Ken ate that. I regreted of eating that steak...T_T but i really like their mashed potatoes. It's very tasty compared to the ones from Chili's.
Later on, there goes the dessert, which is ice cream and had a bottle of Root Beer from Australia and also a bottle of Apple juice from US, Snapper. Both of them cost around RM8.90.. -_-"
And ken took a picture of me, just snapping for fun. Want to try out his new L lens which cost around RM 3k... rich bugger and he plans to get another walking lens for RM5k... really really rich fela. I don't think i could afford such expensive lens till i work. Photography is really an expensive hobby -_-"
by the way, all the pictures taken above are all taken by Ken, not me. I didn't bring my cam along.
So, after dinner, we went for a movie which is Transformers... My favourite cartoon when i was a lil brat! The effect was really good but the problem is the Deceptecons died really fast and Jazz died and Bumble bee lost his leg. I don't know why they replace Bumble Bee with a Chevolet and not the classic Beetles by VW. Jazz is still the same in the cartoon, the Porche.
After the movie, thought of joining my friend at Velvet Underground but unfortunately his friend can't bring me in... damn! but anyway... it's been some time i didn't club and last friday i went to watch the dance competition at Ruums and after that we went there to club. Music at first was good, Hip Hop RnB but later on they change to Trance, i still prefer clubs to put either house or Hip Hop RnB, these two category of music will sure make me get onto the dance floor. Drank quite alot that night and stuck my finger into my throat and force myself to puke but it's hurts my stomach, so, didn't really puke that night but the next day when i woke up i can still fill the drunkness in me tho i'm sober. URGH...! But confirmed that this coming thurs i'll go club again and this time will be my favourite place, MAISON!!!!! yay!



